I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
