well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
