Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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