The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
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