found the other keg... it's in the tree
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
i out mim tonsoeep
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