She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
