I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
