didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
