Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
