I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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