Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
