that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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