I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
