Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
he laminated a picture of his dick.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
