What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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