my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
