I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
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