i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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