the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize