I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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