Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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