Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
