# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
