Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
