You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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