Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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