my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
