scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
