i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
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