this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
