The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You can't just leave with hair like that
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
