Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
