Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
