literally had 100 drinks last night.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
