And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
