Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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