Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
