im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
