careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize