He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
