Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
how does that bad decision feel?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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