So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
