you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
