idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
