I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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