How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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