Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
