Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
