Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
