Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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